Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Tales from the Crypt

Tales from the Crypt

In honor of Halloween, I've decided to post some horror stories. Of course, I must point out that this is geared towards my West Coast (esp So Cali) friends.

(*just picture yourself gathered around a fire in the woods, and imagine your friends faces as you share these tales of horror with them*)

..... Alina presents.... Tales from the Boston Crypt.

As winter nears and the temperatures drop, I've had the delight of hearing stories of winter from my roommates. Several weeks ago, we were all "hanging out" in the living room when the topic of conversation suddenly turned to the cold weather....

"If you're lucky - this winter will be like last winter... it only snowed a few times really - not too bad."
"Oh, but remember a few years ago when we had a horrible winter? I was walking to school and the cold air/wind was making my eyes tear - but as soon as the tears would form, theyd freeze! I kept having to unstick my eyelashes!"
"Ya, my nose usually freezes - because it gets all runny and then it just freezes so I can't breathe!"
(WHAT!?!!?!? How do your bodily fluids freeze?!?!)
"But don't worry Alina, if you bundle up you'll be fine. Just wear long johns under your jeans and maybe windbreakers over your jeans - really thick socks, a tank, a sweater, a jacket - make sure its a down jacket - a few scarves and a beanie - maybe ear muffs and don't forget the sunglasses"
(I'll be so bundled up one strong gust and I'll be rolling down the hill!)
Me: "What do you mean a few scarves?"
"Well, I usually wrap one around my head and then put my beanie over it - then I tie another one around my neck"
"Oh, my mom gave me a face mask thing - i just pull it on over my head and it has holes for my eyes and nose and mouth"
(um, like bank robber style?)
"And, just to warn you, it gets so cold that your fingers hurt - even with really warm gloves on. Don't ever put your hands in hot water after you've been outside because the hot water will burn"
"But you can get these little heating pads for your hands and feet - you just insert them in your gloves and socks"
(heating pads? are you serious?)
"Lastly, be sure that every inch of you is covered. Some days, it gets so cold they have frostbite advisories..."
Me: "What's a frostbite advisory?"
"Well, basically they make announcements saying that if you are outside for more than 30 minutes, any part of your body that is uncovered is at risk for frostbite"


WHAT!?!?!?!? FROSTBITE? But i like my fingers, toes, nose and ears...

There you have it folks... horror tales of what lies ahead for the next few months. AH!

Friday, October 06, 2006

Drunken moments


Current mood: Better than this morning :)

I get to see Jon Stewart tonight... yay!

I was supposed to go to a party but I figure my liver will appreciate the break :) ... esp after last night.

Last night was a blast... i think?

Really, I hate not remembering but at the same time, its hilarious to hear the day after stories. And there are some amusing ones about last night for sure.

One in particular...

Apparently I met a Turkish guy last night. I don't remember this AT ALL. Anyway, I guess I had a conversation with him... I guess it had to do with Armenians... I GUESS it had to do with the Genocide and I have a slight hunch that he made some "denialist" statements. At that point, I decided to call Lev (or Lev called me - not sure) and I told Lev I met a Turkish guy and he had to talk to him and tell him that I was right. Lev of course said no. Nevertheless, I handed the phone to the Turkish dude and Lev told him "I don't want to talk to you" (something along the lines of, you arragont lying assholes killed my ancestors and you deny it so I have nothing more to say) and the guy handed me the phone and probably said something along the lines of, "Lev told me that I was right" - so I picked up the phone and started yelling at Lev for telling this Turkish dude that he was right and I was wrong!!!

So, moral(s) of the story:
- Don't pick fights with Turkish people at bars.
- Don't pick fights with Turkish people at bars when you are obviously drunk.
- Don't pick fights with Turkish people at bars when you are obviously drunk and can't formulate coherent arguments!
- Don't get drunk on a Thursday night (on an empty stomach) when you have class the next day and...
- Make that a double don't get drunk on a Thursday night (on an empty stomach) when you have an additional make up session for one of your classes the next day and must therefore endure two back to back hours of class all the while staring at the door wondering if you'll make it all the way to the bathroom if this nausea doesn't go away!

oh, and don't elbow people in the stomach if they just had their appendix removed. I guess it hurts or somethin.

Wednesday, October 04, 2006

CONTRACTS explained :)


Current mood: cheerful

A convo about a contracts case:

XXXXXXXX (4:23:18 PM): why would RR company pay 6.85 for something, to sell it for 6.85 for someone else
XXXXXXXX (4:23:28 PM): unless they planned on selling it for more to the original customer
XXXXXXXX (4:23:32 PM): who was supposed to get teh coal
XXXXXXXX (4:23:44 PM): but figured they'd just ask for market from the Prison to be fair?
CraZRnR (4:23:52 PM): rr company wasn't in the business of buying or selling
CraZRnR
(4:23:58 PM):
rr company had to ship it
CraZRnR (4:24:17 PM): its like, fed ex loses your stuff that you were sending to me
CraZRnR (4:24:22 PM): and they pay you for whatever your stuff cost
CraZRnR (4:24:33 PM): fed ex never owned that stuff
CraZRnR (4:24:36 PM): they never paid you for it
CraZRnR (4:24:38 PM): but they lost it
CraZRnR (4:24:47 PM): so theyre paying you back for the value of what they lost
XXXXXXXX (4:25:06 PM): ok, I see
CraZRnR (4:25:09 PM): except, say the reason it got lost is because fedex delivered the cookies you made for me - but delivered them to jake instead
CraZRnR (4:25:13 PM): and jake took them and ate them
CraZRnR (4:25:14 PM): so
XXXXXXXX (4:25:17 PM): So at that point, C is out of the picture, they don't give a shit anymore
CraZRnR (4:25:32 PM): fed ex says, i'll pay you for the cookies - but then turns to jake and says, jake, you owe me because you ate the cookies
CraZRnR (4:25:53 PM): so jake says
CraZRnR (4:26:03 PM): no, i dont want to pay you for the cookies because
CraZRnR (4:26:08 PM): i thought these cookies were from...
CraZRnR (4:26:11 PM): professor hylton
XXXXXXXX (4:26:15 PM): hehe
CraZRnR (4:26:22 PM): and hyltons cookies cost 1/2 as much as kaj's
CraZRnR (4:26:26 PM): so
CraZRnR (4:26:32 PM): the whole argument is just fed ex and jake
CraZRnR (4:26:38 PM): nothing to do with the coal companies
XXXXXXXX (4:26:56 PM): and the key is that the cookies are identical, cause if one was of better quality, then this would turn out differently
CraZRnR (4:27:09 PM): yes
CraZRnR (4:27:11 PM): i think so
CraZRnR (4:27:13 PM): good point
CraZRnR (4:27:17 PM): i so didn't think of that
CraZRnR (4:27:18 PM): lol
XXXXXXXX (4:27:18 PM): well, the cookie example was freakin' brilliant

Tuesday, October 03, 2006

When you know you need to stop asking questions in class!


For those in Law School - I'm sure you're all familiar with the terms Gunner or Classhole.

For those not in Law School - let me translate - That one wise ass who always raises his hand - purely for the sake of hearing his/her own voice.

Ya, those. You all had them - undergrad, grad... heck, at the office meetings! (Employee to Boss: "The other day, a customer came in, and I was very nice to them and they bought lots of merchandise... I did the right thing right?" - ya dumbass, no more rhetorical questions please!)

Well, I always wonder if professors realize these guys are just being pricks or if they truly think the students are asking valid questions.

Today, I noticed how our professor addresses this:
If you ask a...
1. Dumb Rhetorical question purely for the sake of hearing yourself speak the professor responds with: "Well, why don't you tell me what you think?" in other words, I'm not going to waste my time answering you - I'm sure you can answer yourself just fine and then feel really stupid for asking a question you just answered yourself while the entire class giggles and/or rolls their eyes.

2. Smart, Valid, Curious question... well, you'll get an answer.

Simple as that folks.

Now if only people would stop wasting class time on absurd hypotheticals with about 20 different what if's in one sentence!